


I Hate Loving You

by nanjcsy



Series: Goodbye Kraken, Hello Reek [3]
Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Bathing/Washing, Claiming Bites, Forced Affection, Forced Kissing, M/M, Rewards, shaming
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-08
Updated: 2015-06-08
Packaged: 2018-04-03 06:34:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4090657
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nanjcsy/pseuds/nanjcsy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based on season four, the episode where Ramsay bathes Reek. I will tell this from Reek's POV and will also finish how I think a good amount of us want to imagine it went.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Hate Loving You

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Lokiscribe](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lokiscribe/gifts).



**It must be big trouble, big trouble. Maybe last night, those bad tricky tricksters they made Him mad. They angered Master and weak, creak Reek must pay for bad things. Reek KNOWS his routine, his chores, when to be in his cage. He KNOWS his rules and his name. Reek, meek, sneak, freak, it rhymes so he can remember. Lord Ramsay told him that. Told Reek how grateful he should be for that. Reek KNOWS how grateful he is, always, forever. This is NOT routine, not at all and that is ALWAYS big trouble. It means to learn something new, which Reek always is bad at. Or it means Master has found another game for his pet, they always HURT.**

_oh please i can't hurt again, oh please what if its another finger or toe and he makes me beg so long to cut it cut it, please cut it off! i was good, i have tried so hard master i really tried! i didn't let them take me! i bit that lady, i bit down on that false sister hard. i ran to my cage and i stayed down, i was good! please don't hurt me, i was a good, loyal reek!_

Wait. Breathe. If you panic HE will hurt you. Don't babble, not even inside. We are here, stay calm. It is a bath room. No weapons, no other men waiting to hurt us. We know how to shave Master, maybe he wants us to attend his bath. We can do that, we can, stay still, stay calm.

_i can't stay calm HE is here and there is new everywhere. will he make me pick the piece he takes? slippery tiles for clumsy feet and oh, its another trick. oh please, don't hurt me anymore, i would do anything, i try to be so good, i try so hard._

NO. Just breathe, look only at the floor and breathe. Master is speaking, pay attention.

_i said that, i said it i spoke and without permission! i told you told you told you it was a trick! what will he do, oh stupid, stupid reek!_

STOP! You are babbling and it's leaking out. Stop and breathe. Just stay calm and behave. Be good, we have to try and be good. Just obey, listen and obey. We can do this, we can do this. Try very hard. A reward is good, a real bath is good. We need to be grateful.

_check, look up at HIS eyes, is it a trick?_

It doesn't matter. Even if it is we have to obey. Just stay calm and obey. We don't need BIG TROUBLE, not when its a reward. Master is telling us and we obey. 

_he will see the scars, see that place, i can't take HIS EYES LOOKING!_

It is already done. See? HIM looking doesn't hurt, it amuses him. Amusing Master without pain is good, remember? Just hush, hush and be good. Feel the hot water, feel what it is like to be warm. Stay calm.

_he is coming over, here it is, i told told told you, here comes the trick! oh, he will drown us over and over, til he grows bored. or use a wire brush to make new scars._

Shut up! Don't even whimper! Stay still, stay low and stay good! Even if it hurts bad, stay good, please! Loyal and good. Stay still. Stay good. We can do this. Hush.

_oh gods, oh master please, here it comes, its the cloth, it will go over my face or maybe-_

HE is washing us. Stay calm, stay good, Master is caring for us. A real reward. A real bath,see? HE is so kind, so good and fair. Stay still and calm. Listen, listen, Master is speaking. Do we love HIM?

_yes yes yes yes it gives us the kind Master, the nice Master, we love him because we have to. yes, love you i love you if it stops the hurt and BAD THINGS so yes please i love you._

He is pleased with us. We love HIM and that is good. Now listen there is more. Hush and listen. Master needs a very IMPORTANT thing and we can do it. Yes, it is a lot and it will hurt to learn it right. We can do this though, we have to. We can. 

_you worry about that, you have to. its too many words, many things i don't want to remember. you do that. Master is cleaning my skin, oh to be clean, thank you thank you oh thank you. why is HE, why is oh no, oh please-_

Hush. Do not move, do not pull away. Do not even flinch, just stay calm, be still. Master is not hurting, HE is not! Kissing does not hurt, just take it. HE could FLAY our lips off, so stay soft and calm. Please. Just do it or it will be such BIG TROUBLE. Good, good stay calm.

_he is he is he is touching me everywhere. all my scars every scar is touched and traced and my tongue is being sucked into his mouth. what if he bites it off why why why must he, does he?_

It is just kissing and touching, just stay calm. Stay still, don't squirm, just behave, please. See? HE isn't hurting us, it is fine. Master can do anything HE wants. Just behave. Be good, loyal Reek.

_he is he is oh gods its cold now and he is TOUCHING THERE THAT SHAMEFUL OH SO SHAMEFUL AND IT HURTS_

Hush. We will endure it, worse to be flayed, or whipped. Just take it, hush and stay still. Turn over, don't fight it, good Reek never fights. Too late, it will happen now and we must just take it.

_oh no please i have been good and why why must he do that, i cannot i cannot, he can't just not that anything else but OH PLEASE_

Stop screaming, don't scream anymore, it hurts but we can take it. Could be worse, could be big trouble so be grateful. We will stop screaming and be good. Yes, it hurts very badly but it could hurt worse if it was HIS knife. HE is talking, listen, listen.

_yes, yes, i am, i listen and i hurt and oh won't he ever stop, he says i am his forever, who else could want something like me and oh he is right. i am disgusting, we are filthy and now we are a whore, please won't he stop now i can't i can't please it hurts and the shame is so bad_

No. Calm and breathe. We have no shame. We are just Reek, just Master's creature. Look, he is done, it is over. And we are grateful because it wasn't skin, it wasn't anything that Master can't do.

_yes yes because master can do anything to his reek. all we are, it is all we are, just reek, meek, weak, leak, leaking things down my thighs. please, i love you master, i do, forever and always. please please no more baths ever again oh please. reek can be good and loyal and know his place. i learned, i know this trick now. i will never wish to be clean ever, reek should be filthy, stinky and untouched._

Do not think of it. Just be calm. Love, obey and be loyal. Master needs us, we must be good and help him. We must please Him and show that we are good. Master is all we have now. Who else could want something like this? We are grateful and good. Stop shaking. Stop sobbing. Good, okay good. Now listen, Master needs us to pretend to be that bad man. We can do that. We will do that.

_yes yes yes, we will please him. we love master, we love him and obey and please let me just be reek and get my dirt back again. if i am very good, if we do good, will he let us be dirty again? can we go back to our cage?_

Yes, breathe, behave. We will have our dirt and cage back. Master will be pleased and we will have no big trouble. _yes. yes. yes. please._

**Author's Note:**

> The actor who plays Reek, Alfie Allen said that in his perspective Reek always thought of getting in BIG TROUBLE with the master. I really liked that.


End file.
